Today's Awwwww moment courtesy of the US Navy


Aviation Electronics Technician Airman Apprentice Tony McJohnston of Fighter Attack Squadron 37, the “Ragin’ Bulls,” was inspecting an F/A-18 Hornet aboard the carrier Harry S. Truman in the Persian Gulf when he noticed something unusual in the plane’s wheel well.

He called over his shipmate, Aviation Structural Mechanic (Equipment) 3rd Class Jeremy Smith, to take a look. They reached inside the $45 million jet and pulled out a foreign object not usually found in a modern warplane — a screech owl.

The ship’s newspaper, the Give ’Em Hell Herald, reported that Smith grabbed the bird, instead of shooing it off, because he worried it might flutter into the cockpit of another fighter being lined up to take off.

But the Truman’s sailors weren’t just worried about their pilots; Aviation Structural Mechanic 2nd class Zachary Gorman, a licensed falconer and a lifelong bird handler, took a look at the owl — which sailors nicknamed “FOD,” as in “foreign object damage” — and pronounced it to be in good shape.

“For the most part the bird was healthy, just a little tired and dehydrated,” Gorman told the Herald.

After being assigned a cardboard box as its “stateroom” aboard the carrier, FOD caught a ride off the ship aboard a C-2 Greyhound carrier onboard delivery flight. When it landed, the sailors let it fly free.

“Since he was in a weak condition, flying to land would decrease his chances of survival, so we thought we would give him a hand,” Gorman said.

Fricking Fracking Rickin Rackin

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Tagline of the day

From The Anti-Emo Pogroms: Mexican Emo Hunts
I wish my lawn was emo so it would cut itself.

Not your average summer camp


It’s a first according to the organizer. This weekend you can learn all about filming, lighting and sound recording from adult film star, producer and director Courtney Cummz as well as other industry insiders all in one place.

Registration for the Porn Camp Seminars was already limited for the gathering according to Tampa Bay based attorney, Brandon Kolb, who's organizing the event. He says they are only able to accommodate between 12 and 20 people. Those people are already signed up.

Brandon Kolb says they got a lot more interest in the event than they expected and are only interested in working with people who are serious about learning more about the porn industry. He refuses to release details on where the event is being held for that reason.

A website about the event lists the different subjects to be discussed during the lectures and workshops that are set to take place Friday, Saturday and Sunday. Subjects to be covered include how to form a production company, laws and regulations, production agreements, booking talent, set preparation, editing, maximizing content, promoting your company and web based marketing.

Participants can learn more about getting a national distributor and can even get reviews of their films at the event.

Attorney Brandon Kolb will talk to participants about legal issues like production agreements, liability and insurance issues.

Kolb has received calls from as far away as England about the event. He says they will definitely hold another porn camp seminar soon that can accommodate more people.

One time, at porno camp...


Rule number 4 violated: Man shoots wife through wall.

Know what it is, what is in line with it, and what is behind it. Never shoot at anything you have not positively identified. Be aware of your surroundings, whether on the range or in a fight. Do not assume anything. Know what you are doing.


Bring out your dead! I'm not dead yet.

Four months after he was declared brain dead and doctors were about to remove his organs for transplant, Zach Dunlap says he feels "pretty good."

Dunlap was pronounced dead Nov. 19 at United Regional Healthcare System in Wichita Falls, Texas, after he was injured in an all-terrain vehicle accident. His family approved having his organs harvested.

As family members were paying their last respects, he moved his foot and hand. He reacted to a pocketknife scraped across his foot and to pressure applied under a fingernail. After 48 days in the hospital, he was allowed to return home, where he continues to work on his recovery.

On Monday, he and his family were in New York, appearing on NBC's "Today."

"I feel pretty good. but it's just hard ... just ain't got the patience," Dunlap told NBC.

Sounds vaguely familiar....


Another teacher and student story

Deputies arrested Lisa Marinelli, a substitute teacher at Mitchell High School on Monday after an investigation showed she had a sexual relationship with an under-age student at the school.

Officials say the investigation began in February after the victim's father reported seeing his son get out of Marinelli's car while pulling his pants up.

That was the clue? Come on. That's how pants are worn by many kids now-a-days. Talking about having things blown.....out of proportion.


Tagline of the day

We use 43 muscles to frown, 17 to smile, and 2 to pull a trigger. I'm lazy and I'm tired of smiling.


Man shot by killer robot


AN 81-year-old Gold Coast man built, and yesterday used, an intricate suicide machine to remotely shoot himself, after downloading the plans from the internet.

The Burleigh Heads man, who lived alone, left notes of his plans and thoughts as he struggled to come to terms with demands by interstate relatives that he move out his home and into care.

He spent hours searching the internet for a way to kill himself, downloaded what he needed and then built a complex machine that would remotely fire a gun. He set the device up in his driveway about 7am yesterday, placed himself in front of it and set it in motion.

The Gold Coast Bulletin will not reveal how the machine worked, but it was attached to a .22 semi-automatic pistol loaded with four bullets. It was able to fire multiple shots into the man's head after he activated it.

Wanted for questioning...


It's Steak and a BJ day


Steak and BJ Day was invented by Tom Birdsey, may he live forever, and may the gods eternally bless his fate. Men everywhere should build shrines and worship this man, who has been so kind as to bless us with a day devoted entirely to devouring massive hunks of cowflesh and having one's member gobbled. Truly, he is a saint among swine, and deserving of the highest accolades in the worlds beyond.

Seriously though, Steak and BJ Day was invented as a response to Valentine's Day, a day in which men get the 'privilege' of showing their affection for their significant other by spending ludicrous amounts of time, money, and effort in showering them in gifts, dinners, shows, and various other things to show them just how special they are to us.

Isn't it about time that there was a day just like that, but devoted to having the ladies show men just how much they appreciate them? Thanks to Steak and BJ Day, this dream has finally come true.

And look how easy it is! Since we're really only one of two things, the formula for showing us that appreciation is really very simple.

First: FOOD! Not any of that new-age healthy co-op market crap, either. Just give us a big hunk of cow. Preferably still bleeding. The napkin will be unnecessary, thanks, that's what the backs of our arms are for.

I think the second part does not require any further explanation from me.

Best thing is: It's a win-win situation! Just think, ladies, of just how hard your man will try to please you on February 14th just at the *thought* of the rewards he will be receiving on his special day. There's no way to lose, unless you have difficulty suppressing your gag reflex.

March 14th is, in short: Best. Holiday. EVAR!

CRAP! It is Lent. Oh well, the second half makes a great consolation prize.


Army AWG unit stripped of HK416s

The Army has stripped the Asymmetric Warfare Group of its weapon of choice — the Heckler & Koch 416 — saying that its mission requires the unique outfit to carry the standard issue M4 carbine.

The decision reverses a policy that allowed the AWG to buy 416s instead of carrying M4s when it was established three years ago to help senior Army leaders find new tactics and technologies to make soldiers more lethal in combat.

Members of the AWG have declined to comment on the issue, but sources in the community told Army Times that the unit fought to keep its several hundred 416s, arguing that they outperform the Army’s M4 and require far less maintenance.

In a response to a March 6 Army Times query, the Army acknowledged initial approval of the AWG’s move to the 416.

“The AWG is empowered to procure, on a limited basis, select non-standard equipment to assist in identifying capability gaps and advise on the development of future requirements. To this end, the Asymmetric Warfare Group did purchase H&K 416 rifles,” said Army spokesman Lt. Col. Martin Downie.

“The AWG also advises units on training, tactics and procedures. In this capacity, the use of the standard issue M4 is required. In support of this mission set, the decision was made to transition to the M4 and the AWG is now turning in its H&K rifles.”

This is the latest round of controversy surrounding the M4 since late November, when the weapon finished last in an Army reliability test against several other carbines.

The M4 suffered more stoppages than the combined number of jams by the three other competitors — the Heckler & Koch XM8, FNH USA’s Special Operations Forces Combat Assault Rifle (SCAR) and the H&K 416.



Revenge (Montezuma's) is a dish that is served cold.

A Gwinnett County restaurant has received the lowest health inspection score ever given in that county -- a 13 out of 100.

Officials shut down the Mar Y Tierra Family Mexican Restaurant at 521 Indian Trail Road in Lilburn after finding numerous violations. The restaurant was not in compliance when it came to sewage and waste water being properly disposed, adequate hand-washing facilities being supplied and accessible or personal cleanliness according to the report.

Health inspectors said they found a bin of raw chicken stored over vegetables that were going to be served without cooking and black mold lining the inside of a cooler.

"The most important ones are the temperature violations, food handling, food storage," Vernon Goins with the Gwinnett County Health Department told Channel 2's Rachel Kim.

The restaurant is closed and its license has been suspended. The manager told Channel 2 the restaurant's food is clean. He said they wre having small problems with their freezer leaking and refrigerator not working.


'Deathstar' has Earth in its sights


A spectacular, rotating binary star system is a ticking time bomb, ready to throw out a searing beam of high-energy gamma rays – and Earth may be right in the line of fire.

Astronomers at the University of Sydney, in Australia, first discovered the unusual and beguilingly beautiful star system eight years ago in the Constellation Sagittarius. One member of the pair is a highly unstable star known as a Wolf-Rayet, thought to be the final stage of stellar evolution to precede a cataclysmic supernova explosion.

"When it finally explodes as a supernova, it could emit an intense beam of gamma rays coming our way", said Peter Tuthill, lead researcher of the team who report their findings in the current Astrophysical Journal.

Though the risk may be remote, there is evidence that gamma ray bursts have swept over the planet at various points in Earth's history with a devastating effect on life.

A 2005 study showed that a gamma-ray burst originating within 6,500 light years of Earth could be enough to strip away the ozone layer and cause a mass extinction. Researchers led by Adrian Melott at the University of Kansas in Lawrence, U.S., suggest that such an event may have been responsible for a mass extinction 443 million years ago, in the late Ordovician period, which wiped out 60 per cent of life and cooled the planet.

Further research would be required to determine if we are exactly in line with the axis of the system – but even if we are, we probably still have hundreds of thousands of years to come up with a solution, said Tuthill.

We can not repel fire power of that magnitude.


Dungeons & Dragons co-creator dies at 69


Gary Gygax, who co-created the fantasy game Dungeons & Dragons and helped start the role-playing phenomenon, died Tuesday morning at his home in Lake Geneva. He was 69.

He had been suffering from health problems for several years, including an abdominal aneurysm, said his wife, Gail Gygax.

Gygax and Dave Arneson developed Dungeons & Dragons in 1974 using medieval characters and mythical creatures. The game known for its oddly shaped dice became a hit, particularly among teenage boys, and eventually was turned into video games, books and movies.

Gygax always enjoyed hearing from the game's legion of devoted fans, many of whom would stop by the family's home in Lake Geneva, about 55 miles southwest of Milwaukee, his wife said. Despite his declining health, he hosted weekly games of Dungeons & Dragons as recently as January, she said.

"It really meant a lot to him to hear from people from over the years about how he helped them become a doctor, a lawyer, a policeman, what he gave them," Gygax said. "He really enjoyed that."

Today is an 01 on the 100-sided dice of life.

How did you become a man?

I kind of preferred getting the keys to the car myself.