XKCD explains the base metaphor

Asking your boss for time off to see the big game.

A veteran Florida congressman wants a break after only two days back on the job. Republican Cliff Stearns says he wants to go to a football game in Miami on Thursday.

Stearns has written to House Speaker Nancy Pelosi asking her to move votes scheduled for Thursday evening and Friday so House members from Florida and Oklahoma can go to the Bowl Championship Series national title game between No. 2 Florida and No. 1 Oklahoma.

Pelosi's office says she won't agree to the request. Among the votes to be considered Thursday afternoon is certification of the Electoral College vote that gives Barack Obama the presidency.

Stearns didn't attend the University of Florida in Gainesville but it's in his district. The game is being played in Miami.

That congressional job getting you down? That's okay, nothing important to do there. Are you ready for some football?

I hear she's a hit at the clubhouse

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Cleansing your spirit

From Yahoo News:

A Zimbabwean soccer player drowned in a crocodile infested river during a ritual to cleanse his team of bad spirits before a match, a state newspaper said on Tuesday.

The Chronicle quoted unnamed sources as saying about 16 players from second division side Midland Portland Cement were told to swim in the Zambezi river in the resort town of Victoria Falls ahead of a soccer match on Sunday.

"The technical team told every player to get into the river so that they could be cleansed of bad spirits," it said.

The paper quoted local police commander Peter Rodzi as saying that after the swim, the other players had noticed that one of the team was missing.

"The area where the team was swimming is prohibited as the current is strong. The river is also infested with crocodiles and hippos," said Rodzi.

Cleansing the gene pool, one spirit at a time.

Dayum

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Setting world records, the wrong way.

From Sofia News:

Bulgaria Women's Hockey Team Registers Record Loss 0:82 to Slovakia

Bulgaria's national women's hockey team registered a world record Sunday by losing 0:82 to Slovakia in its final fourth match at a tournament in Latvia.

A total of 37 spectators in the audience witnessed how the Bulgarians received a goal on average every 44 seconds - 82 goals in a 60-minute game.

The Slovakia fiasco came after the Bulgarian team lost 0:41 to Italy, 0:39 to Latvia, and 1:30 to Croatia. Thus, its score in four matches totals 1:192.

Sometimes, try, try again just doesn't cut it...

Frank Caliendo does Charles Barkley to his face.

Oh, and while you are there at SBB, check out these.

Lateral. This game is over.

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Better to be pissed off than pissed on.

Baylor offensive line/tight ends coach Eric Schnupp was suspended indefinitely Tuesday after school officials learned he was cited for urinating on a bar early Sunday.

Schnupp, 30, was not arrested but was ticketed at 2:20 a.m. Sunday for disorderly conduct/reckless exposure inside Scruffy Murphy's, Waco police spokesman Steve Anderson said.

The Class C misdemeanor will result in a $258 fine, according to the Waco Municipal Court.

Waco police were in Scruffy Murphy's to help a woman who passed out in a bathroom stall, Anderson said. An employee saw Schnupp urinate on the bar while employees were moving patrons out at closing time, according to the Waco Tribune-Herald.

Well, I'm surprised he wasn't being charged with being drunk.....in....public.

Hey, hey, hey. I was drunk in a bar. They threw me into public. Arrest them.

Best play of the weekend...imho...

Why like the NFL? Because men can play dress up

There are three reasons the NFL packs in fans: violence, beer and the ability of grown men to get away with dressing up in stupid costumes.

Without those three items, all intertwined, the only people who would go to NFL games would be the corporate stooges in their tax-deductible luxury boxes and club seats, the ones not cheering because it interrupts their networking.

Otherwise, why pay the outrageous ticket price (average seat — $67) for the privilege of paying hefty sums for parking, drinks and food and then sit in the parking lot afterward, waiting for traffic to crawl out? Why kill so many minutes viewing the down time for those TV commercial breaks?

It would be a lot easier to watch the game at home, and if you wanted a crowd, invite family and friends over, then charge them semi-outrageous prices for parking, drinks and food. They’ll thank you for giving them such a break. And they don’t have to deal with parking.

That is the NFL’s real power. For all that violence and beer supply as a fan’s release, the freedom to dress however you want is the ultimate sign that this is a sport different than others. Sure, people do this at college football games, but not anyone over the age of 22.

People sometimes wonder why soccer hadn't caught on here in America. They have violence, alcohol, and people dressing up in the stands. Ah well, as long as there is a Pop Warner game around, there will be a training ground for NFL fans.